Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Think Before You Speak

My grandfather just passed away. He was a special person. I know they say that about every person who dies but it’s true. If there’s one lesson I can give over to all of you from his life it is this: Think before you speak.

He was a quiet and humble, very humble person.

He had a sign hanging on the wall of his study that said:

ADVICE – TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN:

WHEN YOU HAVE A DESIRE TO TALK, TAKE A DRINK OF WATER. “LESS TALK SHOULD SATISFY YOU.”
[FROM TIME TO TIME, YOU SHOULD REITERATE THIS STATEMENT (IN PRIVACY)] IN CASE YOU WANT TO STATE YOUR OPINION ABOUT SOMETHING THINK TWICE, TALK ONCE.
(LIKE THE CARPENTER SAID, MEASURE TWICE, THEN YOU WILL CUT ONCE, MEASURE ONCE AND YOU WILL HAVE TO CUT TWICE.)
AFTER THINKING TWICE – THINK AGAIN. THEN COUNT TO TEN. THEN THINK AND ONLY THEN TALK.
READ THIS PAGE EVERY DAY.

This is what he personified. He didn’t just speak whatever was on his mind. I think this advice is golden. If only we’d think before we let those words escape our lips, we may not have caused so much pain to others. We may be able to cause someone’s heart to swell with pride if we would have thought of the right words to use to compliment.

Think before you speak. It sounds so simple. It’s something we can work on every day.

Let’s take this lesson from someone who lived by the advice he gave to others.

L’ilui nishmas Avraham Nechemia ben Aryeh Leib

11 comments:

  1. Baruch Dayan Haemes.
    He must have been special. And he merited special grandchildren who follow in his ways.

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  2. Echoing MW, he must have been a wonderful example to his special children and grandchildren.

    I love this lesson. Thank you for sharing.

    Baruch Dayan Haemes. May your family only be blessed with simchos from here on.

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  3. Baruch Dayan Haemes.
    The lesson that your grandfather left is so true and important!Many times people tend to just splurt out what he/she feels like saying without actually thinking before he/she speaks This view on not thinking before you speak, just saying what is on your mind at that time, saying something if you FEEL like saying it, is exactly the way of the goyim and how the goyim feel .However, there are so many petty arguments that a person can prevent from happening if he/she would just think before he/she speaks! The life-long skill of thinking before one speaks CAN be done with thought and patience...
    Keep on going you will and CAN be able to do it!!May working on this middah be as a zichus L'ilui Nismas your special grandfather!
    May all of klal yisroel only see simchos in the future!

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  4. Baruch Dayan Haemet. May HaShem comfort you and your family during this difficult time.

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  5. Baruch Dayan Haemes. I'm sorry for your loss. He sounds like a very special and very wise person.

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  6. MW-thank you. It is a real zechus for him that all his children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren are all frum, followintg the derech haTorah.

    SiR-yes, he was an example for us. We need to learn from him. Amen to your brachah - simchos is definitely something we all need!!

    Simy-that's right. This is something that will bring a lot of goodness to the world if we all try to implement it into our lives!

    SG-Amen.

    Elle-thanks, he was a very special person. There's so much we can learn...I'm still hearing stories and learning!

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  7. Baruch Dayan Haemet. Im so sorry for your family's loss but its so beautiful how a person can live on eternaly when his family passes on his messages for others to learn from. Thank you for giving us a glimpse into the Gadlus of your grandfather. I'm printing out that sign for my room :)

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  8. Baruch Dayin HaEmes. May your family be comforted, and may his memory always be a bracha.

    I love his advice and I'm including it on my "Wall of Inspiration." Thank you. It's a very, very important reminder.

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  9. tamar and Rivki-thanks.

    It is comforting to hear that the message is spreading and people are reading this all important lesson for life. Spiritual growth that comes after a person passes on ensures that their legacy remains forever.

    Thank you for learning from my grandfather a"h.

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  10. baruch dayan emes.
    he sounds like a truly special person.

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  11. nechama-thanks, yes he was. We have a lot to learn.

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