Light in the Darkness

Today is Rosh Chodesh Kislev. 

Kislev is the month of miracles. It is also the month where we can find light in the darkness, find hope in the midst of despair, find an inner spark of strength that will help us carry on.

It is starting to get dark earlier. The clock was just changed and the days are getting shorter. You must remember that morning follows every dark night. Every single one. No matter how dark things may be, there is always a little flicker of hope. Of trusting Hashem that things can and will change for the better. 

Hashem can do anything! He has the ability, resources and the power to cause anything in our lives to change at any given moment. With our limited eyesight, we sometimes think we know what it will take to make those things happen, but Hashem is beyond our understanding. He doesn't have a human brain and doesn't "think" in human terms. He is so above us and so capable of anything, that he can perform miracles-because He is our G-d. 

Golel ohr mipnei choshech v'choshech mipnei ohr-Hashem rolls away light before darkness and darkness before light. It is a cycle of light and dark, but the light will always follow the dark night. Life has ups and downs, there are times when we feel weak and want to give up and times when we feel empowered to face our fears, to move forward and to keep trying. Who gives us this strength? 

Hashem.

Who makes day follow night? Every single night?

Hashem.

When you go to sleep at night, you know without a shadow of doubt that when you wake up in the morning, it will be day. It may be dark, rainy and gloomy some days, but it will be a new day. A chance to start fresh, to leave yesterday behind you and to try again, to correct yesterdays errors and to make today better. You never doubted that morning will come again. 

Perhaps you can instill that same rock-solid faith in your heart, knowing, really knowing, that after the dark time there will be light. That Hashem will send a yeshuah, that He will help you through your challenges and instill strength and willpower to keep going, to keep trying...and He will make things better for you. That it will not stay dark forever.

And just like the chashmonaim found a teeny jug of oil that kept the light of the menorah burning for eight days, may whatever little light you have to hold on to keep you going, keep your inner flame burning and may you see miracles in your own life and in the lives of those around you.

A gutten Chodesh!

Kislev-My Miracles

One of the things I learned from my mother was the importance of expressing gratitude. Not just for the big things but for the little things as well...because they may not be so little. She was very big on thank you cards, sending them out often to those who did favors for her.

Even after my brother Shalom a"h, was niftar, my mother expressed her appreciation to all those who assisted in trying to save his life-the main lifeguard in camp who came running to the scene after he fell from the tree, the assistant lifeguards, the rebbe who said shema with him in the hospital in his last moments...all of them received thank you cards in the mail after my brother passed away. She wanted them to know that our family did not chas v'shalom blame them for not working hard enough and that we were sure they all did their utmost in trying to save Shalom's life...and that this was a decree from Hashem and we were accepting it. They were in no way at fault. And she used those thank you cards to put her feelings into words.

She was always thanking our teachers, the school staff, the delivery guy, the neighbor who did her a favor. She said thank you to the car service driver, giving him a tip, even though this was his job. She'd thank the cashier as she left with her bags....everyone. She took note of every single thing, little and big and showed her hakaras hatov. And I took this lesson from her and try to carry it with me wherever I go.

Just yesterday, I received a phone call from my son's school. A phone call I've been waiting for ever since the beginning of the school year. The person on the other line confirmed that everything was in place and some important paperwork we were waiting for finally went through. Things should be smooth from here on.

Interestingly, the day before I got this phone call, as I left my son's school building knowing I was still waiting, I turned to Hashem and said, "Hashem, that's it. This is in your hands. We did whatever we could and there's nothing else that could be done. Now I'm turning to you and relying on you completely. Please...make this work out already...make it happen soon. How much longer can we wait for this?" 

The next day, I got that phone call...my own, personal miracle.

And after I got that phone call, I sat down and penned the following,

Here's a little note to say thank you,
For all the behind-the-scenes work that you do.
We don't usually get to see the details,
And we don't know exactly what your job entails.
But for us - you worked hard, giving up was not an option
And for that we'd like to express our deepest appreciation.
You kept trying - calling and emailing too,
You listened to our (almost) daily question of "anything new?"
And now that all the paperwork finally came through,
We have two words for you-Thank You!

How much time did it take me to write that? Just a couple of minutes. But do I know how much that thank you means to the one who put in all the work for us?

I learned this from my mother-to take a few minutes to express my appreciation in this way.

***

Just that same evening, something happened that made my heart stop beating. It still continues pounding every time I think about it and replay those few moments in my mind.

I was home alone with my children and was busy in the kitchen when I heard my little baby, who is at the crawling stage, start screaming. I ran into the next room and saw the front door-the door right above my staircase, wide open. My heart froze. I stood at the top of the staircase and for a split-second I knew he fell down the long flight of stairs. 

I was wrong.

I looked down the steps...but he was not there. Then I saw a flash of orange-he was right at the top of the staircase! He was lying up side down, with his head on the third step from the top and his feet on the second step-right where the staircase starts to turn. Had he chas v'shalom been one step lower, where the staircase leads straight down...I can't imagine where I'd be at this moment. But I wouldn't be here typing up this blog post.

I scooped up my baby and hugged him so tightly, my hands trembling and shaking. I kissed him and cried knowing that I just experienced my own little miracle.

I felt like...this is what I needed right now. I needed this two second scare as a reminder of what I have and what I need to appreciate. I have three little miracles in my care, three precious little children. Although it's true that Hashem watches over them, over me, every minute of the day, it took this to show me just how closely He is watching over my family.

Today is Rosh Chodesh Kislev. It is the month of miracles. The month when we experienced the miracle of Chanukah-of light in the darkness. 

May you each experience your own personal miracles this month and may you feel Hashem illuminating your path, illuminating your life. May the darkness you've experienced be transformed into light and may you be blessed to notice and appreciate the miracles in your life...because the small miracles...they are really big.

A gutten chodesh.

Rosh Chodesh Shevat

I posted this last year and wanted to share it with you once again.

Today is Rosh Chodesh Shevat - the first day of the month. There is a lot to learn from the fact that every month we celebrate Rosh Chodesh. It is a message to all of us that there is always a chance for renewal. No matter what happened last month, this month is starting anew and you can start again.

The phases of the moon give us this message. The moon starts out very small and then gets bigger and bigger towards the middle of the month and then it gets small again. This is the story of the Jewish People. We started out small, then at some points in our history we got bigger, expanded, were successful and then again we got small. We experienced pain, persecution, embarrassment as a Nation but there was always a chance for us to shine. No matter how many times we were hurt in our history, we were never and will never be fully annihilated. Just like the moon, which at times is so small you can barely see it, but yet it's always there and will always shine, the Jewish Nation will always survive, even if it seems like they are almost extinct. Hashem promised us that we will endure forever.

And each person can take this message to heart - just like the moon expands and grows, even when it seems like it's so tiny and has no chance, every person has a chance to grow and change, even if it seems like there is no hope.

This month specifically, the month of Shevat has special significance to a person's growth. It is the month that is Rosh Hashana L'ilanos - the Rosh Hashana for the trees. It is the month where Hashem decides how the trees will grow and blossom. Some people have a custom to daven for a good esrog (for the following Succos)now for this reason.

Ki Ha'adam Eitz Hasadeh - a person is compared to a tree. There are many explanations for this comparison. One way to explain it is that just like a tree needs water to thrive and grow, a person needs Torah, which is compared to water, to be able to grow spiritually.

Torah is compared to water for a few reasons. Firstly, just as water is cleansing, the words of the Torah are purifying. Also, water is something anybody can drink and appreciate. It's not like wine where you have a certain status or class and that is how you can come to really enjoy that drink. It's the same with Torah - anybody can learn it and a person should never think, "I'm too little to learn this." A person should never be embarrassed to learn from someone else. Everybody has what to learn and share when it comes to Torah!

Just like water quenches the thirst of a person and leaves them feeling refreshed and energized, when one learns Torah or hears an inspiring thought, they feel like their thirst has been quenched! They feel refreshed, they feel energized! Torah has the power to give a person a new and exciting feeling about whatever they have just heard!

Torah is our lifeline - without it we would not be able to survive. It is the Torah that has kept us alive throughout the generations. By holding on strong to the Torah and keeping the mitzvos, we were able to continue to exist no matter what we went through.

Logically and statistically, it doesn't make sense that the Jewish Nation is still around. So many people have tried to destroy us yet they were never successful. How can that be? It is because Hashem promised to us that He will never let us be totally wiped out. And since we held on strong to the Torah and mitzvos even in the hardest times, we are still around to tell our story.

There's a famous quote from Mark Twain about the Jews and he questions: what is their secret?!

The Torah is our secret!

A gutten chodesh! May this month be one of spiritual growth and may you appreciate the Torah as the greatest gift Hashem has given us!

Rosh Chodesh Shevat

Today is Rosh Chodesh Shevat - the first day of the month. There is a lot to learn from the fact that every month we celebrate Rosh Chodesh. It is a message to all of us that there is always a chance for renewal. No matter what happened last month, this month is starting anew and you can start again.

The phases of the moon give us this message. The moon starts out very small and then gets bigger and bigger towards the middle of the month and then it gets small again. This is the story of the Jewish People. We started out small, then at some points in our history we got bigger, expanded, were successful and then again we got small. We experienced pain, persecution, embarrassment as a Nation but there was always a chance for us to shine. No matter how many times we were hurt in our history, we were never and will never be fully annihilated. Just like the moon, which at times is so small you can barely see it, but yet it's always there and will always shine, the Jewish Nation will always survive, even if it seems like they are almost extinct. Hashem promised us that we will endure forever.

And each person can take this message to heart - just like the moon expands and grows, even when it seems like it's so tiny and has no chance, every person has a chance to grow and change, even if it seems like there is no hope.

This month specifically, the month of Shevat has special significance to a person's growth. It is the month that is Rosh Hashana L'ilanos - the Rosh Hashana for the trees. It is the month where Hashem decides how the trees will grow and blossom. Some people have a custom to daven for a good esrog (for the following Succos)now for this reason.

Ki Ha'adam Eitz Hasadeh - a person is compared to a tree. There are many explanations for this comparison. One way to explain it is that just like a tree needs water to thrive and grow, a person needs Torah, which is compared to water, to be able to grow spiritually.

Torah is compared to water for a few reasons. Firstly, just as water is cleansing, the words of the Torah are purifying. Also, water is something anybody can drink and appreciate. It's not like wine where you have a certain status or class and that is how you can come to really enjoy that drink. It's the same with Torah - anybody can learn it and a person should never think, "I'm too little to learn this." A person should never be embarrassed to learn from someone else. Everybody has what to learn and share when it comes to Torah!

Just like water quenches the thirst of a person and leaves them feeling refreshed and energized, when one learns Torah or hears an inspiring thought, they feel like their thirst has been quenched! They feel refreshed, they feel energized! Torah has the power to give a person a new and exciting feeling about whatever they have just heard!

Torah is our lifeline - without it we would not be able to survive. It is the Torah that has kept us alive throughout the generations. By holding on strong to the Torah and keeping the mitzvos, we were able to continue to exist no matter what we went through.

Logically and statistically, it doesn't make sense that the Jewish Nation is still around. So many people have tried to destroy us yet they were never successful. How can that be? It is because Hashem promised to us that He will never let us be totally wiped out. And since we held on strong to the Torah and mitzvos even in the hardest times, we are still around to tell our story.

There's a famous quote from Mark Twain about the Jews and he questions: what is their secret?!

The Torah is our secret!

A gutten chodesh! May this month be one of spiritual growth and may you appreciate the Torah as the greatest gift Hashem has given us!

Dream Come True

A group of four frum (religiously observant) businessmen from Cleveland had arranged to travel together by plane early one Sunday morning to a New York City trade show. It was Rosh Chodesh Elul and R' Mordechai, one of the businessmen, had assured the others that, provided their plane landed on time at La Guardia Airport in New York City, they would be able to catch any of a number of minyanim for Shacharis in Manhattan and still be at the trade show when it opened at 9:00 A.M.

R' Mordechai was supposed to pick up the others at 5:00 A.M. to catch the flight an hour later. But he overslept, and at 5:30 his brother, a second member of the group, came frantically to his house to see what had happened. R' Mordechai awoke with a start and told his brother to get the others and go without him; he himself would have to make the next plane. The three others made their way to the airport as R' Mordechai frantically put his things together, dashing around to find his tallis, tefillin, attaché case, trade samples, and car keys. Equipped with a cup of coffee and his radar detector, he drove with abandon and got to the plane just as the doors were about to be closed. The others were surprised that he had made it.

The plane took off from Cleveland's Hopkins Airport in perfect weather. But shortly after the flight was in progress, the captain announced that he had just been informed that there was a thick blanket of clouds and fog enveloping the New York City area. He promised the passengers to keep them informed of any developments. The men began to get apprehensive, for they had not really left much time to get from the airport to a minyan and still be on time to the trade show.

The flight continued as passengers tried to figure out alternate ways of getting to their destinations if they couldn't land in New York. Soon the captain's voice came over the intercom again. The news was not good, he announced. The fog had traveled westward over the New Jersey border, and not only was it impossible to land in New York, it would be dangerous even to attempt a landing at Newark Airport. They would have to land further south -- in Washington, D.C.

* * *

On board with these businessmen was a small group of Chassidim. They had come to spend Shabbos in Cleveland Heights with their rebbe, R' Mechele, and were returning to New York this morning as well. When the plane landed in Dulles Airport, in the nation's capital, the Chassidim and the businessmen decided that perhaps they had better form a minyan right there, for by the time they could catch a connecting flight and land in New York, the time for reciting Shema would be long gone. They counted to see if they had ten. Indeed, the Chassidim were six, and then they counted the businessmen: one, two three -- and R' Mordechai made four! They had their minyan -- and only because R' Mordechai had caught the plane!

A member of the airline personnel designated a corner of the waiting room where they could say their morning prayers. The ten men congregated there, each in his tallis and tefillin. All this was in perfect view of any passersby who could watch the proceedings through the glass partition behind which the mispalelim stood.

As they were saying Hallel, a well-dressed man slowly and hesitantly walked into the area where they were davening. A few heads turned to see what he wanted. "Would you mind if I said Kaddish?" the man asked softly.

One of the businessmen, R' Yankel was taken aback. The man hardly looked Jewish. How did he even know about Kaddish, and what did he want with it? It was then that R' Yankel noticed that the man was wearing a black ribbon on his lapel. (Numerous Reform Jews who do not observe the ritual of rending a garment as a sign of mourning wear a black ribbon instead.)

R' Yankel motioned to the man to wait for a few moments and he did so. At the appropriate time R' Yankel went over to the man, and said, "You may begin Kaddish." The man looked around uneasily, then began. "Yisgadal veyiskadash..." he whispered, and burst into tears. He regained his composure and continued, "...shemei rabbah..." The men answered Amen with reverence. The gentleman struggled through the remainder of the words, as the men of the minyan helped him get through the entire Kaddish.

When he finished, he nodded his head in thanks and asked, "Is there another one to recite later?" They told him that there was. He waited patiently and then after the davening they motioned to him once again to begin. And once again as he said the Kaddish he burst into tears. All in the minyan could not help but be touched by the sensitivity and sadness of the man.

When Shacharis ended, one of the Chassidim went over to the gentleman and introduced himself. After a few moments of conversation the chassid said, "I couldn't help but notice that you wee so emotionally torn as you prayed. Is everything all right with you?"

It was then that the gentleman told this incredible story.

"You see," he began, "my father died just a few days ago, and last night he came to me in a dream and said to me, 'Robert, how come you're not saying Kaddish for me?'
"In my dream I replied, "Dad, I hardly know how to say Kaddish, and besides, there are no synagogues where I live and I am always traveling."

"'I need you to say Kaddish,' my father insisted to me. I kept repeating that I just could not get to a place where I could say Kaddish for him. It was then that he asked me, 'But what if I send you a minyan? Would you then say Kaddish?'

"'Of course I would,' I replied, and that's when I woke up. I couldn't believe that dream. I was trembling as I awakened. As I was getting dressed I managed to convince myself that there was really nothing to that dream. But then I came to the airport to catch a flight, and there, to my unbelieving eyes, were all of you praying in a minyan -- in the minyan that was obviously meant for me!"

Taken From Rabbi Paysach J. Krohn, Around the Maggid's Table, © 1989, Mesorah Publications, Ltd., pp. 197-201.

Rosh Chodesh Shevat

Tomorrow is Shabbos Rosh Chodesh Shevat - the first day of the month of Shevat. It is a chance to start anew, make changes in your life and become a better person.

Shevat is the fifth month (from Tishrei) - which means that 4 months of the year have passed and we are 1/3rd into the calendar year. There are still 2/3rds of the year left until Rosh Hashana. Think for a moment. Look back at the first 1/3rd of your year. Are you happy with what you see? With the changes you made? I'm sure each of you made some commitment to change over the year - did you keep to your word? It's not too late. You still have another 2/3rds of your year to become who you want to be. I think this is a good point in time to stop and look ahead. Sometimes, by the time elul comes around, it feels like so much of the year has passed. So every month, you a special reminder to stop and take a look at what you did so far and see if you are happy with how you are progressing in your yiddishkeit.

Also, the fact that it is Shabbos Rosh Chodesh is a very special thing. The Sefer Panim Yafos writes that each Rosh Chodesh is Mashpiah - influences - the whole month, and each Shabbos is Mashpiah over the whole week. This Shabbos, then, will be a very influential Shabbos, and we should strive to maintain its high level of kedusha. Let us try to a few minutes of Shabbos day to learn something special that will help us improve in our avodas Hashem.

There are many books that start a new learning cycle on Rosh Chodesh Shevat - you have a great opportunity to utilize the time you have on Shabbos and the fact that it is the beginning of a new month to become closer to Hashem and improve yourself!
Here are some suggestions: (You can click on the links.)

Positive Word Power - Building a better world with the words you speak.
Praying With Fire - Igniting the Power of Your Tefillah - A 5-Minute Lesson-A-Day
Praying With Fire 2 - More insights as to how to Ignite the Power of Your Tefillah - A 5-Minute Lesson-A-Day
A Daily Companion - The concepts and laws of proper speech as formulated by Sefer Chofetz Chaim.

May this month be filled with many happy things, many good changes and may you feel Hashem in your life more and more - as you keep changing and becoming a better person!