Parshas Emor

There is a special mitzvah for a farmer to leave the corner of his field for the poor man when he is harvesting his crop. He demonstrates his awareness of Who blessed him with this good and shares it with those who are less fortunate than he is.

When we are blessed with plenty, we should remember those who aren't as fortunate as we are and share it with them. And while we think of giving in terms of money, there are so many ways to give. We can give our time or our knowledge, a listening ear or a compliment, encouragement or good advice. Some forms of giving don't have a price tag but they're worth more than all the money in the world!

May we always be on the giving end by sharing whatever good we have with others - from money to talents and everything in between!

Parshas Yisro

The Torah lists the mitzvos Bein Adam lamakom-between man and Hashem, side by side with the mitzvos Bein Adam lachaveiro, the ones involving interpersonal relationships. 

We see that the Torah is not just a set of rules that govern the spiritual aspects of our lives. It's so much more than that. The Torah tells us how to act with the people closest to us. Honor your parents. Don't be jealous of your neighbor. Don't steal-money, time or possessions from anyone. Do what it takes to be peaceful and loving to all those you encounter. 

May we be able to live a life of Torah by keeping not only the mitzvos between us and Hashem, but by also maintaining wonderful relationships with all the people we come in contact with!

Parshas Vayeira

Avraham Avinu invited three guests into his home, even though they didn't look like him and they were idol worshippers. His kindness extended to every type of person, no matter what they looked like on the outside.

Hachnosas Orchim sometimes transforms us into kinder, more sympathetic people. We treat strangers with more respect and tolerance than our own family. Perhaps this week, we can pretend our close family members are our guests and treat them with an extra level of care and consideration. We can be more giving, more patient and more understanding of those closest to us. Although it's easy to fall into the trap of habit and snap at the people who push our buttons, if we put in the effort to treat them with extra consideration, we can transform our relationships and make them stronger.

May we be able to act with forethought and respond to our close family members with a gentle touch, bringing more light and love into our homes!

Parshas Va'eschanan

We are told that we may not add on to or take away from any of the commandments in the Torah. The Torah is perfect and was given to us by a perfect God with specific instructions on how to live the most fulfilling life.

If we add on to one of the mitzvos, it might become too heavy and burdensome and we'll drop the whole thing. Doing less than what we were commanded to do makes us lose out on the perfect prescription for a meaningful life.

May we be able to enjoy the benefits of following the mitzvos and feel the deep satisfaction that comes along with living a Torah life!

It's Shabbos Nachamu-which means "let us comfort." We have an obligation to offer chizuk to others when they are down. When we comfort someone else, it also soothes our soul and makes us feel better.

May we live to see the day of ultimate comfort, of the geula shelaima...so soon!

Candle

How does it work when we do something positive as a zechus for someone else? If they benefit, do we lose out on our reward?

The mitzvos we do are compared to a candle. Like it says, "Ner Mitzvah v'Torah Ohr." 

In the same way that a candle does not lose any of its own light when used to ignite the flame of another candle, when we do mitzvos to benefit someone else, they gain and so do we. They get the spiritual benefit of our good deed and we also get rewarded for the good that we did.

This is how we can do mitzvos as a zechus for the neshama of someone close to us to go higher in gan eden. When we do the mitzvah, whatever it is, tzeddakah, tehillim, chessed, refraining from doing something not-so-good, their neshama gets elevated in shamayim. At the same time, we get the spiritual benefit of doing that act. We grow in our middos and build up a storehouse of reward that will wait for us.

That is the beauty of a candle! It can bring light to others and brighten our own life. And every mitzvah we do for a neshama lifts them up higher. It's like sending a present to them in shamayim. And we don't lose out one bit. We gain from the mitzvah too.

May you be able to use your time in this world to bring light and blessing into the lives of everyone you know. May the zechusim you do for others bring light into your own life while enlightening theirs!

Thanks for Sharing

Have you ever walked outside and heard blaring music coming from a car driving down the street?

Whenever that happened while I was out, I'd say to whoever I was with, "Thanks for sharing!" The music coming out of those cars weren't usually songs I'd want to listen to while having a massage. They were songs I'd choose to listen to while doing exercise. Or maybe I'd rather not listen to those songs at all... :-)

For a while, it was hard for me to understand why someone would do that. Why do they have to drive down the street and "share the wealth" with people who never asked for it? Why couldn't they just enjoy the music in their own car and not have to make so much noise?

Until I had that incredible urge.

I was driving down the street listening to a song that I absolutely love. A song that empowers me, that moves me, that pushes me to want to do more, to do my best no matter what is going on. It's a fast song, it has a great beat, and the words are just plain awesome.

And so...I did it. I rolled down my windows and turned the volume up to the max. 

Why? Why did I do that?

It's because...I had something that felt so incredible to me...and I wanted to share that with everyone around me. This song did something to me. It moved me. It inspired me. It talked to me. And I wanted everyone else to feel it too. I wanted them to hear the words, to feel what I was feeling. I wanted them to feel the power of the song so they could be touched the same way the music touched me.

All this got me thinking...

You know, we as Jews have something so incredible. We have the most awesome gift ever. Hashem gave us the Torah. It is a part of who we are, it helps us learn how to be more sensitive and caring to others. It turns us into better people.

Do we ever feel like we really want to share it with others?

When we feel a positive emotion that is so overpowering, we have this tremendous urge to share it with others. It's like when someone is in "simcha mode". When they get engaged, have a baby, marry off a child...or when a very close relative gets engaged, has a baby or gets married...the emotions inside of us are so strong, we just want to share it. We want all our friends and neighbors to know who got engaged to who, who had a baby and if it was a boy or a girl, who got married...all the exciting details of the simcha that make us feel so happy. All we feel like doing is sharing that incredible joy with others.

So...what about our Judaism? Are we as passionate about what we have that we feel this same urge to give over to others and share the wealth?

This year, before Shavuos, take the time to think about it. Think about the things inside you. The things you care deeply about. And if you are passionate about Torah and mitzvos and you have thoughts and ideas you want to share with someone who is not as fortunate as you are, who doesn't have the same Torah background as you have, sign up for a program that will give you the opportunity to share your wealth.

You can sign up to learn with someone on the phone once a week with Partners in Torah. You can learn with someone in person, one on one. And if you don't feel you have that inside you, you can host a kiruv training seminar in your house as a way to help others learn more about kiruv. Or, you may choose to donate some of your ma’aser money to any of the organizations who are involved in kiruv. Oorah also has many ways of getting involved.

Whatever you choose, just realize that you have been given a unique treasure. You own it...and it is a part of you. And if you felt passionate enough about it, you'd also feel like you want to do whatever you can to share it with others. 

Do what it takes to share the wealth. 

It will enrich your life in so many ways.

Pure Eyes

I posted this before and wanted to share it with you again...now that the summer is here, it is a good reminder to all of us.


After my last post, I wanted to give some chizuk to all of you on how to keep yourself pure and guard your eyes especially during the summertime.

People think only men have to watch their eyes and that women do not have to be so careful. But I want you to know that it is not true. One of the sheish mitzvos temidiyos, the six constant mitzvos (that can be done at any moment of the day and one receives reward for doing it) is in this week's parsha, Parshas Shelach. It says, v'lo sasuru acharei levavchem v'acharei eineichem, you should not look after images or things that are not appropriate for you - this applies to women just as much as it applies to men!

I once heard an incredible thought on this topic from R' Zecharia Wallerstein.

He spoke about how the guests who came to Avraham Avinu's house washed their feet before entering his home because there was sand in their feet and they worshiped the sand. Since he was so careful not to let a trace of avodah zara, idol worship, into his home, he had them wash their feet before letting them in to his house.

So the question is, how far can a person go? If these people worshiped the sun, would he have closed all the shutters? It's only sand!

But Avraham was showing that you can never be too careful. He took such great care in making sure not to let a speck of avodah zara, in this case the sand, into his home - even though it was so tiny.

And we see what an effect this had on his son because later on, Yitzchok became blind from the sacrifices of his son Eisav's wives, sacrifices of idol worship. Why did he become blind from this? Because his neshama was so sensitive to even the tiniest crumb of avodah zara that he couldn't handle the tumah, the impurity, that came from the smoke of the sacrifices. This is what caused him to become blind! It did not affect his wife, Rivka because she didn't grow up in a home where even a little piece of sand was not allowed into the house by those who worshiped it!

There is only one body part that is so sensitive to something as small as a grain of sand. If you had sand between your fingers or toes, it would not irritate you. However, if a grain of sand somehow got into your eye, it would bother you to no end. You would be busy trying to get it out, rolling your eye in all directions, rinsing it with water, and doing anything possible to get it out of your eye.

But what's the big deal??? It's ONLY a grain of sand!!

It IS a big deal because the eyes are extremely sensitive.

This shows you just how sensitive your eyes must be spiritually and each person must guard them so carefully. You must not allow even the smallest grain of sand into your eyes! We learn from Avraham how important it is to be careful with what you let into your eyes.

There's a famous saying, "the eyes are the windows to the soul" - whatever you let your eyes see will have an everlasting impact on your neshama. So guard your eyes carefully, especially in these summer months!

When you walk outside and see women who are less dressed than dressed, turn your eyes the other way! Look in the opposite direction!

When you are online and see a link, picture or video clip that looks tempting, quickly close the tab or window you are open to. Don't let yourself stumble! Be strong! Resist the temptation and keep those grains of sand out of your eyes so that you don't irritate them with things you shouldn't be seeing!!

I know it's hard. It's hard for me too. But think about how irritating it would be if you had a piece of sand, one tiny grain, stuck in your eye. Think about how quickly you'd run to the sink to flush your eye with water.

May you have much hatzlacha keeping your eyes pure!

My Big-Little Boy

Yesterday was a big day. Shalom Baruch had his upsherin.

It's a transformation. Suddenly, the long pony is gone, the curls are gone and all that's left is a cute little boy (with the same fun, wild personality) with a whole different look. He starts to look like...an adult. His face still has those little baby features but now I start to expect so much of him. It looks like he went through such a major change...until he has his first tantrum. Then I realize, he's still the same little kid he was before his haircut.

I look at my big little boy and I think about so many things. I think about my hopes and dreams for my oldest child. I think about the role model I want him to be for his younger siblings and how I hope he will show them the right way. The oldest child has a certain responsibility. His siblings look up to him and want to follow what he does. When the oldest child is good, does what is right, listens to and respects his parents, his younger siblings (hopefully) follow in his lead. I hope my son will be the proper role model for his siblings.

I look at that yarmulka he wears so proudly and I hope he will always be so proud of the yarmulka on his head. I hope he will never, ever want to take it off. That he will love Judaism...each and every part of it. That his heart will be filled with love AND fear of his creator. A yarmulka is meant to be a reminder...Yarei Malka, fear of the king. 

And I wonder...

A man keeps his head covered at all times to remind him that there is always something, Someone above him. Is that the reason why a woman also covers her hair? Is that supposed to be a reminder for her too? 

Da ma l'malah mimcha...know that there is Someone above you...remember Hashem always...place him in your mind...think about Him. Think about Him when you make decisions in your life, when you are unsure of right and wrong...

I hope my son will be able to make the proper decisions as he grows up. There are so many temptations out there. When I think about what it will be like to raise my children in our generation, in the generation of technology, where you get things you want faster than you can snap your fingers, I get scared. It's scary to raise a child in a generation like ours. But I daven and hope for siyata dishmaya and that Hashem help me teach my children properly, every step of the way. That I do the right things, instill love for Him in their hearts and teach them by example what it means to be good, to do what's right.

I look at his proud smile as he runs to put on his tzitzis in the morning. I hope he will always kiss them the way he did this morning. With such happiness, with such excitement. How will he hold on to his innocence, to his love for this mitzvah? 

Tzitzis are meant to be a reminder, v'lo sasuru acharei levavchem v'acharei eineichem. Do not stray...do not let your eyes wander...Shalom Baruch, if I could engrave just one message on your heart, this would be it. V'lo sasuru...Don't let your eyes wander. Don't look at things you shouldn't. Don't look at what other people have with jealousy. Keep your eyes pure. Keep your heart pure. Hold on to the precious innocence you have now. Focus on what you do have and be happy with it. Don't keep looking further, for more and for better. Because it may not be better. It may not make you any happier. What you have is best for you.

I look at my little boy and I feel blessed. Thank you Hashem for helping me reach this milestone.

Sefira - Climbing Higher

This was posted last year and I want to share it with you again.

To continue on where I left off on last post, I wanted to get practical. I felt like the last post was inspirational and can leave the reader feeling like they want to do something to use each day for growth but then the feeling may creep in: Now what?!

How do you get to a level where by the time Shavuos comes around, you can look back and say Wow! I really changed! I used each day to grow and come closer to Hashem!

Let's get real. I know that in the past I haven't been able to look back after 49 days and say that I've really grown.

Change is difficult.

It takes work.

Here's something I heard from my very special married sister that I wanted to share with you because it can make all the difference.

You need to choose something small.

And that is SO true. That's how you can change over the 49 days of sefira.

In Judaism, growth can only be made if you take baby steps.

Little, small, teeny baby steps.

Proof: Sefira is forty nine whole days. That's quite a long time if you think about it! It's not like you are expected to change in a weeks time. No. It's gradual. You have more than a month to change, to prepare for the big day!

Now we are already more than halfway through sefira but I still think it's worth sharing these ideas so that if you haven't started yet, you can still utilize the time that's left to take something little and start making a change.

That's what I said. Something little.

It's up to you to decide where you want to begin.

Here are some ideas:
You want to become a more giving person? You want to work on chessed? Do one small thing every day to help someone else. It can be an anonymous act of kindness (like closing an opened safety pin so it wont prick someone else - I heard this idea at a speech a while back and it really left an impression on me!) or it can be something else - calling someone to let them know you're thinking of them. Whatever it is, make sure it's something small that can be done every day.

You think your kibbud av va'eim could use a little polishing? That's a hard mitzvah. But if once a day you make sure you had a positive thought about your parents, your mother or your father, you are already on your way up that spiritual ladder. One "thank you" to your parent, one extra chore to help out, one less complaint - and you're getting there.

Are you too connected to technology? Do you want to connect to Hashem but find yourself whipping out your phone/laptop/iPad too often to check your text messages or emails? Once a day, just one time during the day, hold yourself back. Instead, direct your thoughts upward and think a spiritual thought.

Do you want to work on your appreciation to Hashem for all the things He does for you but find yourself complaining about the things going wrong too often? Again, make it a once a day thing - think of something you are thankful for because in reality, Hashem gives you so, so much! Your eyes, your ears, your taste buds, your friends, your family, a healthy body, a digestive system, flowers, sunrise, music, the ability to understand, a job, a home...and the list goes on and on. So take a moment once a day to thank Hashem for ONE THING and then when Shavuos comes, you can look back and say, I've grown in my appreciation to Hashem during this sefira period.

Does your bein adam l'chaveiro need a little tune-up? There are so many ways to improve but just take one little step every day - give someone a sincere compliment. Hold in that urge to answer back for an extra second. Smile at someone when you pass them by in the hallway. Hold the door open for someone walking in behind you. Stop yourself before you respond to someone's gossip. These are hard things but if you take a small step, you can get there at the end of the 49th day.

Can your tefillah use a little more concentration to make it better? Decide that you are going to look into your siddur during one tefillah each day. You can choose the same tefillah, the first one you daven when you open your siddur, or a different one every day. But make sure that at the end of each day you can look back and say that you looked inside once. Because that can really make a difference in the kavanna that you have. When you look inside, you see the words and automatically your brain thinks about what those words mean! It may take a quick second before you get distracted but if you push yourself to look inside again at that tefillah, you'll see a difference in how you are able to concentrate!

There are so many areas that a person can change. When you look at all the ideas thrown out to you here, it may seem overwhelming. But just choose one thing. And take small steps towards your goal. Your goal is that when Shavuos comes around, you will be able to look back at this time with pride knowing that you utilized each day.

But if you do too much, you can fall back and give up because it becomes too hard. Taking something little upon yourself makes it a goal that can be reached.

Happy Climbing!!

It's a Boy!

I'm sitting in the hospital bed holding a precious little baby in my arms. I look at him and I see purity and perfection. Two perfect little eyes squeezed tightly shut, a teeny little nose and mouth, ears in just the right spot on the side of his face and ten teeny little fingers. So small and so perfect.

What a miracle. After nine months (and 5 and a half hours of labor), I finally got to hear..."It's a boy!"

I look at my son and wonder. How did this all come to be? A newborn baby is such a miracle. When everything goes the way it should and the baby is healthy, I cannot help but thank Hashem. There are so many little details that go into a healthy child. Everything is fine. I am so grateful. I hold him in my arms and watch him breathing...his chest moves up and down, up and down...I can look at him for hours and I wouldn't get bored.

My little baby was born on shabbos and just had his bris this past shabbos. When he got his name, it was a very emotional moment. I held back the tears while it was announced...Moshe Simcha. We chose the name Moshe after my (husband's) grandmother's brother who was killed in the holocaust and we added the name Simcha. Moshe was 10 years old when he was killed but he did have a miracle during that time. He dug himself out of a pile of dead bodies and somehow found his sister, my grandmother and they were able to spend some time together.

When a baby cries during the bris milah, it is a big eis ratzon and a time to daven. My baby certainly cried-plenty.

What is the meaning behind this mitzvah?

Jews believe that everything Hashem gave us can be used for spirituality. We elevate the food we eat by making a bracha and we enjoy different treats, nosh (and junk!) on shabbos-because shabbos is a day where we are supposed to enjoy ourselves. Even the junk food gets elevated-just by enjoying it on this special day.

Hashem gave us bodies to be used for something spiritual-marriage. When a little boy gets a bris milah, there is a message being given over-even though he is too young to understand it. Your body is holy, your body is special. His parents hope and pray, during that special time while he is crying, that he use his body for purity and that he keeps himself holy. Temptations are out there and it's easy to fall. Every Jewish boy has this as a reminder, a reminder that his body is holy...and he should know that if he saves it for marriage it will be all the more worth it.

As a girl you should know that your body is beautiful and there's a good reason why we are told to keep it covered. It's not that you're ugly, no way! You have a special beauty that no one can take away from you. When you have something beautiful, you keep it hidden. Just like a precious diamond is kept covered in a velvet case and just like a wedding gown is kept covered and protected and only taken out for when it is needed, your body is special and you aren't meant to walk around exposed and showing it off. It is meant to be saved for a special time when you are married. And if you save it and are careful now, it will be so much more exciting and so much more special when the right time comes!

So as my baby cried, I davened for him. I davened that he should be able to internalize this message and use his body for holy things only. That he should be able to hold back from all the temptations that are out there and keep himself pure.

I look at my son and all I see is an innocent little child. No aveiros, no impurities. And I just wish he could stay that way-totally and completely pure. It's a scary world out there and I can't protect him forever. But I know that he has this mitzvah to carry along with him and I hope he will keep the message with him always.

I thank Hashem for giving me a perfect, healthy little baby. He is precious, he is pure and he is mine.

Mazel tov!

Feeling for Others

I wrote this last year and wanted to share it with you again.

In this weeks parsha, Parshas Lech L'cha, Hashem told Avraham to leave the land he lived in and to go out and travel. Avraham, who excelled in the mitzvah of hachnosas orchim, hospitality, would now have to be a guest.

What can we learn from this?

The Torah isn't just a storybook - it is a guide for life. It is here to give us lessons on how to live life today - here and now. It's not just nice stories about our ancestors and the things they did. There are practical lessons for us to be able to apply to our lives, so many generations later and we can learn them from studying the parsha. The Torah is eternal and the things written in it so many years ago still apply to us today!

Hashem wanted Avraham to experience firsthand what it's like to be a guest, a traveler, a stranger in another land so that he would be able to bring his mitzvah of hachnosas orchim to another level. Avraham, who was a master host, the best you can get at treating guests needed to see what it's like to be a guest at someone's house so that he would get to feel the discomforts, the shyness, the awkwardness a guest feels when he goes to the home of someone he doesn't know. Then, he would be able to fulfill this mitzvah to the maximum.

And we see, in next week's parsha, Parshas Vayeira, three malachim (angels) disguised as guests came to Avraham's house. He greeted them, welcomed them in and treated them in the best way possible, and he did this only after he himself was a guest, after he knew what it felt like to be uncomfortable in a stranger's house. That's when the Torah tells us how he fulfilled this mitzvah of hachnosas orchim.

We can take this to another level.

The best way to know how to treat others is by putting yourself in their shoes. Try to imagine what it's like to be in their situation. Then and only then can you really identify with what they are going through and treat them properly. When you hear that someone just went through something difficult, the way for you to truly feel with them and know how to help them is to try to picture in your mind what they are experiencing. Then you can try to help them out the best way possible.

It is interesting that many organizations were started by people who were in a situation and needed help. Once they realized what it was like to, for example, care for a sick family member without support, deal with the overwhelming feelings and needs of the birth of a special needs child, take care of marrying off children when there is only one parent to do the job, they decided to start an organization that would help others in the same situation so they could make it easier for them when they have to go through it too.
Many of these big organizations only started by people who felt a lack - and decided to do something about it!

So the lesson you can take from the parsha is that just like Avraham had to go through the experience of being a guest in a stranger's home before he could fully appreciate and fulfill the mitzvah of hachnosas orchim, the way to feel for someone else is by putting yourself in their shoes. This way, you will be a better friend and a better support to those you know who are experiencing difficult times in their lives. And when someone you know is going through happy times, by you feeling with them and putting yourself in their shoes, you can really be excited for them and experience joy on a whole new level.

May you always be able to join in others simchas and happy times!

Think About it

I posted this once before and wanted to share it with you once again.

Now that we are in the nine days, it's time to really think about the churban and what we can do to bring moshiach closer.

We have so many opportunities throughout our day to do mitzvos. And like we've all learned when we were younger, each mitzvah you do adds a brick to the bais hamikdosh and yes-it is true! Each mitzvah you do helps bring the geula closer!

It's hard to imagine what we are missing when we never lived in those times. But it shouldn't be too hard to feel, to really feel that we want it back-even though we never experienced life with the bais hamikdosh. It takes a little bit of thought but once you think about it, you will realize how much we really NEED moshiach to come already!

Take a few minutes to think about the things going on around you. There is so much pain in the world. When moshiach comes, that pain will end. People who are sick will become healthy, orphans will be reunited with their parents...and the list goes on and on. There are people who are struggling financially, people with emotional problems, parents and children who need a big band-aid to improve their relationship...and all these things can and will be fixed one day!

We are busy with so many things throughout our day and what we can do is elevate our actions so that the mitzvos we are doing anyway become filled with enthusiasm and excitement. This way, they wont just be actions, mitzvos that are plain and simple, they will be great! How can we do that?

So here's the tip. You need to take an extra minute before you do something to actually think about what you are about to do.

Let's start with brachos.

We spend plenty of time each day eating. Don't you think that by spending a few extra moments before putting the food into your mouth, that bracha can reach a higher level?
The bracha of mezonos-thank you Hashem for giving me food that keeps me full and satisfied!
Shehakol-that everything Hashem created is an extension of His will. Everything exists only because He wills it.

These thoughts take a few extra seconds of your time, but by really thinking about what you are saying as you are saying, you add so much to the bracha you are saying!

There are plenty of other mitzvos that you do throughout your day. If you make yourself aware and try to think about what you do just a minute before you do it, your mitzvah will become so much greater! It's the kavannah, the thought that goes into it that makes all the difference!!

The Three Weeks - A Poem

I wrote this poem a few years ago...but the message still remains! Hopefully, next year we wont need to read it!

During the three weeks,
There is a change in mood,
And when we get to the nine days,
We stop eating fleishige food.

Why all these changes?!
Is there a point here?!
There is a message we should take,
And show Hashem we really care.

Although it was many years ago,
We still remember it now,
The bais Hamikdosh, Hashem’s holy house,
Was destroyed and burned to the ground.

It was a place of total clarity,
Where we gathered three times a year
And now it is gone, it is no more,
And for this we should shed a tear.

But how much do we really feel it?
Do we mourn the way we should?
Do we genuinely feel,
That we are missing out on so much good?!

We have to stop and think,
About the churban and its loss,
And how we can rebuild it,
No matter what, at all costs.

If r"l, YOUR house was gone,
And was burned in a terrible fire,
And you watched it burn to the ground,
You saw those flames rise higher and higher,

And the people closest to you,
Had their lives taken away,
Yes in the time of the churban bais Hamikdosh,
All this happened on one day.

Hashem’s palace, His home,
Was destroyed on Tisha B’av,
And believe it or not,
This too came from His love.

Because Hashem let out His anger,
On bricks and stones,
Instead of destroying all of us,
The Jewish nation as a whole.

And now it’s up to us,
To help rebuild it fast
By doing as many mitzvos as we could
To build the third bais Hamikdosh that forever will last.

So use this time to be extra kind,
Do chesed with the people you know,
Keep adding bricks to the bais Hamikdosh shel ma’alah,
So back to Yerushalayim we will go.

Take on something extra now,
Say tehillim, smile at your friends,
Apologize to those you have hurt,
Yes, now is the time to make amends.

Just show Hashem you are trying,
And you want to come back to Him,
And by each person doing teshuva,
He’ll bring us back to Yerushalayim!

Pure Eyes

After my last post, I wanted to give some chizuk to all of you on how to keep yourself pure and guard your eyes especially during the summertime.

People think only men have to watch their eyes and that women do not have to be so careful. But I want you to know that it is not true. One of the sheish mitzvos temidiyos, the six constant mitzvos (that can be done at any moment of the day and one receives reward for doing it) is in this week's parsha, Parshas Shelach. It says, v'lo sasuru acharei levavchem v'acharei eineichem, you should not look after images or things that are not appropriate for you - this applies to women just as much as it applies to men!

I once heard an incredible thought on this topic from R' Zecharia Wallerstein.

He spoke about how the guests who came to Avraham Avinu's house washed their feet before entering his home because there was sand in their feet and they worshiped the sand. Since he was so careful not to let a trace of avodah zara, idol worship, into his home, he had them wash their feet before letting them in to his house.

So the question is, how far can a person go? If these people worshiped the sun, would he have closed all the shutters? It's only sand!

But Avraham was showing that you can never be too careful. He took such great care in making sure not to let a speck of avodah zara, in this case the sand, into his home - even though it was so tiny.

And we see what an effect this had on his son because later on, Yitzchok became blind from the sacrifices of his son Eisav's wives, sacrifices of idol worship. Why did he become blind from this? Because his neshama was so sensitive to even the tiniest crumb of avodah zara that he couldn't handle the tumah, the impurity, that came from the smoke of the sacrifices. This is what caused him to become blind! It did not affect his wife, Rivka because she didn't grow up in a home where even a little piece of sand was not allowed into the house by those who worshiped it!

There is only one body part that is so sensitive to something as small as a grain of sand. If you had sand between your fingers or toes, it would not irritate you. However, if a grain of sand somehow got into your eye, it would bother you to no end. You would be busy trying to get it out, rolling your eye in all directions, rinsing it with water, and doing anything possible to get it out of your eye.

But what's the big deal??? It's ONLY a grain of sand!!

It IS a big deal because the eyes are extremely sensitive.

This shows you just how sensitive your eyes must be spiritually and each person must guard them so carefully. You must not allow even the smallest grain of sand into your eyes! We learn from Avraham how important it is to be careful with what you let into your eyes.

There's a famous saying, "the eyes are the windows to the soul" - whatever you let your eyes see will have an everlasting impact on your neshama. So guard your eyes carefully, especially in these summer months!

When you walk outside and see women who are less dressed than dressed, turn your eyes the other way! Look in the opposite direction!

When you are online and see a link, picture or video clip that looks tempting, quickly close the tab or window you are open to. Don't let yourself stumble! Be strong! Resist the temptation and keep those grains of sand out of your eyes so that you don't irritate them with things you shouldn't be seeing!!

I know it's hard. It's hard for me too. But think about how irritating it would be if you had a piece of sand, one tiny grain, stuck in your eye. Think about how quickly you'd run to the sink to flush your eye with water.

May you have much hatzlacha keeping your eyes pure!

Cheese Blintz Forgeries

Someone sent this email to me - I think the message is great! Many people don't feel inspired by Judaism. Read on to see how this Rabbi answers the question.

Question of the Week:

Judaism doesn't do it for me. To be honest I don't understand what you see in it. I've been there done that, and it's not for me. What do you say to people like me who simply are not inspired by Judaism?

Answer:
You remind me of the story of the poor man's cheese blintzes.

A poor man was once walking the streets, feeling hungry, when he was struck by a delicious aroma. From out of the kitchen window of a huge mansion wafted the smells of a rich man's breakfast. Looking through the window, he watched carefully as the cook mixed the ingredients and prepared a pile of cheese blintzes. He had never seen or smelled anything so appetizing in his life.

He ran home and told his wife, "We must have some cheese blintzes for breakfast. They are delicious. Can you make me some? All we need is French pancake mix, milk and eggs, some butter to fry them in and cheese for the filling."

"Certainly my dear husband," the kind woman replied. "I will whip up the best cheese blintzes anyone ever tasted."

But when she looked into her pantry for the ingredients, she was greeted by empty shelves. An industrious and resourceful woman, she wasn't phased. "We will have to be a bit creative," she thought to herself. "I haven't got any French pancake mix, but a little potato flour should be just as good. We are a little low on milk. I'll just use water. Eggs.... I don't have any eggs, but I can throw in a few potatoes. We certainly can't afford butter for frying, but I have some old oil that I used last week, I am sure it can be used again. And cheese costs a fortune these days. We will have to settle for some mashed potatoes instead of cheese, that will be close enough."

In no time the delicious breakfast was ready, a pile of home made cheese blintzes. The good wife brought them before her excited and grateful husband, who eagerly bit into the first cheese blintz he had ever tasted in his life. After chewing for a while on the first blintz, his face turned from eager anticipation to bitter disappointment.

"I have to be honest," he said, "I don't really get what those rich people see in cheese blintzes. They really are nothing special...."

The Judaism you have tasted is about as authentic as those cheese blintzes. You may think you have been exposed to the Jewish way of life. After all, you sat through a year of bar mitzvah classes, crept into the back row of a synagogue on Yom Kippur every a year and even spent three months on a kibbutz in Israel when you were 19.

This is all very nice. But these are not the ingredients for a true Jewish experience.

If you have never racked your brain over a page of Talmud; if your soul has never been touched by the deeper meanings of the Torah; if you have never felt the embrace of a warm and spiritually committed community; if you have never experienced the peace and holiness of keeping a Shabbos fully and correctly, then you have never had a taste of real Judaism.

Enough of the cheap imitations. Go eat a genuine cheese blintz.
Good Shabbos,
Rabbi Moss

To subscribe to emails such as these, send an email to rabbimoss@nefesh.com.au

Shavuos Thoughts

This was posted before but I think the message is still powerful and you can gain from reading it again.

Here are some beautiful thoughts on Shavuos.

There is no ONE mitzvah that we do on Shavuos. On Pesach, we eat matzah and marror, on succos, we sit in the succah and shake lulav and esrog, on Rosh Hashana, we blow the shofar, etc…but on Shavuos, there is no specific mitzvah that we must do. The difference is, that on Shavuos, all we have to do is want to accept the Torah and that’s all! When Hashem went to all the nations, He asked them, “Do you want the Torah?” and they all answered no for various reasons, but the underlying reason was the same: they were not willing to change their lives around to live by the rules of the Torah. Esav cannot live without murdering and Yishmael cannot live without stealing. They cannot live without filling their desires and doing whatever they want. Hashem is waiting to hear each and every one of us say, “I WANT to accept the Torah today, I WANT to live a life of connection to you! I am willing to make real changes in my life to become closer to you and elevate my level of avodas Hashem!”

And on Shavuos, it is as if Hashem comes around again and asks each person, “Do you want My Torah?” Every person should ask themselves, “Do I want to accept the Torah???!!!”

We might think that when Bnei Yisroel said na’aseh v’nishma, they were saying, “Hashem, we are willing to accept Your Torah even if it’s bitter for us,” but NO! Bnei Yisroel said, “Hashem, even if the Torah is hard for us, chiko mamtakim, v’chulo machmdim, it is so sweet and so delicious!! We know that even if it’s hard for us, we are sure that in the end, it will be the sweetest thing in the world!”

For example, a Jew who is not frum looks at people who keep Shabbos as if they are in a prison and feels so bad for them. But once he gets to taste the beauty of Shabbos, and he realizes what you could do on Shabbos, he knows how lucky we are and doesn’t say that anymore!!!!

When Aharon Hakohen died with the misas neshika, (he died with a kiss from Hashem,) his brother Moshe asked him, “What do you see?”
Aharon answered, “I can’t describe it to you but all I can say is I wish I would have gotten here earlier.”

When you ask a ba’al teshuva what it’s like to keep Torah and mitzvos, he can tell you, I feel like I got a kiss from Hashem. I can’t describe it to you but all I can say is I wish I would have gotten here earlier!!

We have to realize how truly lucky we are to have the Torah, which teaches us how to live the best life in the world!!! Shavuos is the time to appreciate what we have and tell Hashem, I want to live with you!!
(R’ Shimshon Pincus zt”l)

Rabbi Milstein said that it’s very easy for us to list our five least favorite mitzvos, but if chas v’shalom, the goyim would not let us keep the mitzvos, (g’zeiras hashmad) which five mitzvos would be the hardest for us to give up?! Did we ever think about what our most favorite mitzvos are?! So tonight, when you lay down in bed, think about it! Think about which mitzvos you love and you would never want to give up for anything!! And realize how lucky we are to have the Torah and mitzvos as our guide of how to live!!

Shavuos is the time of the birth of Mashiach so may we all be zoche to greet Him THIS YEAR IN YERUSHALAYIM!!

May you all have a beautiful and inspiring Shavuos!!

Today - Pesach Sheini

Today is Pesach Sheini. What is so special about this day?

When Bnei Yisroel celebrated their first Pesach in the midbar, there were some people who were unable to partake in the korban pesach since they were tamei (they were impure because they were exposed to a dead body). They came to Moshe Rabbeinu and complained to him saying, “It’s not fair! Why should we lose out on this special mitzvah? We also want to be able to fulfill it!”

They didn’t say to themselves, “Yessss! We missed out on it and now we don’t have to do this mitzvah! We can get away with not doing it…” or anything of the sort. They were bothered and hurt by the fact that they were losing out on a chance to do a mitzvah. This mitzvah was so precious to them that they were upset that they didn’t get to do it! They took the time to bring this matter to Moshe's attention and beg for another chance!

Hashem told Moshe about Pesach Sheini-which gives any person who was unable to bring the korban at it’s proper time (through no fault of their own-not because they were lazy) a second chance. And it wasn't just for that year, it wasn't just a one-time thing. This was a message and a mitzvah for every generation. From now on, every year, on the 14th of Nissan, we celebrate Pesach Sheini.

The first thing to think about is, are we so excited and do we love mitzvos so much that when we don’t get to do it, we feel like we lost out on the opportunity of a lifetime and wish we can make up for it? Do we realize how precious each and every mitzvah truly is? We can take this message from the Jews in the midbar who begged for another chance to do the mitzvah they lost out on.

And the second thing to learn is that Hashem gives every person a second chance. It is never too late to change. If there is something you wanted to work on, something you want to stop doing or something you wanted to start doing, now's the time to take the message and make that change. You can always come closer to Hashem, even if you feel you are so far away from Him.

So take the message, make the change and...enjoy the matzah!

Sefira - Climbing Higher

To continue on where I left off on last post, I wanted to get practical. I felt like the last post was inspirational and can leave the reader feeling like they want to do something to use each day for growth but then the feeling may creep in: Now what?!

How do you get to a level where by the time Shavuos comes around, you can look back and say Wow! I really changed! I used each day to grow and come closer to Hashem!

Let's get real. I know that in the past I haven't been able to look back after 49 days and say that I've really grown.

Change is difficult.

It takes work.

Here's something I heard from my very special married sister that I wanted to share with you because it can make all the difference.

You need to choose something small.

And that is SO true. That's how you can change over the 49 days of sefira.

In Judaism, growth can only be made if you take baby steps.

Little, small, teeny baby steps.

Proof: Sefira is forty nine whole days. That's quite a long time if you think about it! It's not like you are expected to change in a weeks time. No. It's gradual. You have more than a month to change, to prepare for the big day!

Now we are already more than halfway through sefira but I still think it's worth sharing these ideas so that if you haven't started yet, you can still utilize the time that's left to take something little and start making a change.

That's what I said. Something little.

It's up to you to decide where you want to begin.

Here are some ideas:
You want to become a more giving person? You want to work on chessed? Do one small thing every day to help someone else. It can be an anonymous act of kindness (like closing an opened safety pin so it wont prick someone else - I heard this idea at a speech a while back and it really left an impression on me!) or it can be something else - calling someone to let them know you're thinking of them. Whatever it is, make sure it's something small that can be done every day.

You think your kibbud av va'eim could use a little polishing? That's a hard mitzvah. But if once a day you make sure you had a positive thought about your parents, your mother or your father, you are already on your way up that spiritual ladder. One "thank you" to your parent, one extra chore to help out, one less complaint - and you're getting there.

Are you too connected to technology? Do you want to connect to Hashem but find yourself whipping out your phone/laptop/iPad too often to check your text messages or emails? Once a day, just one time during the day, hold yourself back. Instead, direct your thoughts upward and think a spiritual thought.

Do you want to work on your appreciation to Hashem for all the things He does for you but find yourself complaining about the things going wrong too often? Again, make it a once a day thing - think of something you are thankful for because in reality, Hashem gives you so, so much! Your eyes, your ears, your taste buds, your friends, your family, a healthy body, a digestive system, flowers, sunrise, music, the ability to understand, a job, a home...and the list goes on and on. So take a moment once a day to thank Hashem for ONE THING and then when Shavuos comes, you can look back and say, I've grown in my appreciation to Hashem during this sefira period.

Does your bein adam l'chaveiro need a little tune-up? There are so many ways to improve but just take one little step every day - give someone a sincere compliment. Hold in that urge to answer back for an extra second. Smile at someone when you pass them by in the hallway. Hold the door open for someone walking in behind you. Stop yourself before you respond to someone's gossip. These are hard things but if you take a small step, you can get there at the end of the 49th day.

Can your tefillah use a little more concentration to make it better? Decide that you are going to look into your siddur during one tefillah each day. You can choose the same tefillah, the first one you daven when you open your siddur, or a different one every day. But make sure that at the end of each day you can look back and say that you looked inside once. Because that can really make a difference in the kavanna that you have. When you look inside, you see the words and automatically your brain thinks about what those words mean! It may take a quick second before you get distracted but if you push yourself to look inside again at that tefillah, you'll see a difference in how you are able to concentrate!

There are so many areas that a person can change. When you look at all the ideas thrown out to you here, it may seem overwhelming. But just choose one thing. And take small steps towards your goal. Your goal is that when Shavuos comes around, you will be able to look back at this time with pride knowing that you utilized each day.

But if you do too much, you can fall back and give up because it becomes too hard. Taking something little upon yourself makes it a goal that can be reached.

Happy Climbing!!

After Pesach - Practical Suggestions

This was taken from a recent Hakhel post - this was SO good I wanted to share it with all of you!

In his commentary on Pesach, HaRav Dessler, Z’TL, writes that life is like a train ride in which one disembarks at stops along the way to replenish his provisions until he gets to his final destination. The stops include Shabbos, Pesach, and other similar special times and events. Similarly, the Ramban in his commentary to Shir HaShirim (8:3) writes that the way one demonstrates his love of Hashem is by attaching it to a particular mitzvah or act of accomplishment, so that it will go beyond mere thought and be actualized in real terms in this world.

We must recognize that the physical pounds that we may have gained over Pesach is symbolic of the spiritual weight which we really should have gained--and not shed--in the days and weeks after the Holiday. Accordingly, we provide the following clear lessons we all undoubtedly learned over Pesach, and some practical way to implement each one in our daily lives:

1. Hakaras HaTov—Such as Moshe Rabbeinu recognizing the good that the earth, the water, and Basya Bas Paroh did on his behalf. There are also many examples--what we owe to the dogs, the donkeys--and even the Egyptians for being our hosts for so long.

PRACTICAL SUGGESTION: Pick one person in your home or office and show him/her an added level of thanks or respect daily in recognition of what he/she has done for you, even if it was only a one-time act or event.

2. Segulas Yisroel—Pesach was a “second creation” for mankind, as it not only established Hashem as the Creator of the world, but as Ongoing Supervisor of the world with B’nei Yisroel chosen as the nation to epitomize the purpose of man’s creation. The commentaries on the Siddur explain “Ata V’Chartanu M’Kol Haamim” as specifically referring to Hashem choosing to redeem us from Mitzrayim and giving us the Torah 49 days later. This explains why so many Mitzvos are “Zecher L’Yetzias Mitzrayim”--because they all emanate from this great choice--our eternal selection to be mankind’s crown jewel.

PRACTICAL SUGGESTION: Do something daily--even if it is a Mitzvah--only because you recognize the gift and opportunity that Hashem has presented you with in being unique, special and different from all that surrounds you--for being that crown jewel!

3. Hashgacha Pratis—Hashem’s care and concern for each individual member of B’nei Yisroel evidenced by such examples as thousands of children being saved from the king’s decree of death, by Moshe Rabbeinu being raised in Paroh’s palace, and B’nei Yisroel walking through Egyptian houses in daylight as just a few feet away Egyptians were enwrapped in such tangible darkness that they could not even move.

PRACTICAL SUGGESTION: At some time during the day, and really as often as possible, feel the Hashgacha Pratis, Hashem’s watching over you, in your daily life. There must be a reason that you saw a loose dog, that you met this particular person, or that you heard that D’var Torah. Also, of course, remember to say “Baruch Hashem”, “Thank You, Hashem” or “Please Help Me, Hashem” quietly (or out loud) as many times as possible during the day.

4. Reward and Punishment—The Egyptians who hid their animals in fear of Hashem were spared those animals. Similarly, in reward for saying that “Hashem is righteous”, the Egyptians merited burial after their Yam Suf debacle. On the other hand, the Egyptians were punished in kind and in proportion to their level of cruelty and animosity expressed towards Bnei Yisroel, as is evidenced, for example, by the way each individual Mitzri died at the Yam Suf--some sinking quickly like lead, others being tossed as stones, and yet others being thrown about like straw. Even those who were gleeful over our servitude, such as the bechorim (first born) of other nations, got their due. May the same exact justice be meted out against each individual Nazi and each one of our past and present enemies, speedily in our days.

PRACTICAL SUGGESTION: Before doing a Mitzvah, and prior to or while contemplating a possible Aveira, recognize that Hashem’s Justice is exact, accurate, and correct. When one is rewarded for davening with Kavannah, he will also be rewarded for coming to Shul in the first place, for arriving there on time, and indeed for every step of the way (instead of turning over in bed). On the other hand, when one is punished, every hurtful word will be counted, each mistruth will be weighed and every degree of Chillul Hashem and Kiddush Hashem will be accounted for. As the Pasuk teaches (Devorim 32:4) “Hatzur Tomim P’Alo…”--perfect is His work, for all His Paths are just. This is related to the incredible degree of middah k’neged middah (measure for measure) with which Hashem runs this world (as we learn when studying the precise nature of each of the ten Makkos). Dovid HaMelech teaches (Tehillim 121:5) “Hashem is your shadow”--Hashem responds to us and it is up to us whether that shadow will be dark and gloomy--or illustrious and beautiful!!

5. Teva (nature)—The Makkos, the concomitant freedom of B’nei Yisroel from the Makkos, the miraculous growth of B’nei Yisroel (from seventy to millions of people) while in desperate servitude, the entire world’s viewing and experiencing of the miracles at the Yam Suf, all dispel the concept of nature and natural existence. Pesach occurs in the spring not only because it made it easier for B’nei Yisroel to leave, but also for us to appreciate that what the world calls nature, is really the Hand of Hashem. It is fascinating to note that the Hebrew word for nature, or Teva, consists of the same letters as “Tava”, which means to drown, referring us back to the Sea, to teach us how ‘natural’ events really occur. It is not surprising, then, that we do not eat Chametz on Pesach, which represents nature taking its course on flour and water, but instead use Matzah, which demonstrates control over what would otherwise occur. The Ba’alei Mussar explain that we must take this lesson and exercise control over our own nature, for the more we do so, the more we will overcome the physical forces of this world, and raise ourselves from the impurities surrounding us, up and towards the 49 levels of purity that we must begin to strive for.

PRACTICAL SUGGESTION: When we see something that looks like a beautiful or even frightening element of nature, recognize that it is really the Yad Hashem, and have it serve as a reminder to you of Hashem’s control over every aspect of the world’s existence--and that you, too, must control your nature and elevate your precious everyday life to the sublime and spiritual!

Reward and Punishment

Q: Is there such a thing as reward and punishment in this world?

A: It says that the schar, the reward of a mitzvah is the opportunity to do another mitzvah which will make a person earn even more olam haba! It's like if someone does a good job at work - they are paid for it anyway, but what does his boss do? He raises them to a higher position in their office so then they pay goes up as well! More opportunities means more reward!

I don't like to think of pain as a punishment, rather, I look at it as a kapparah, an atonement, for something a person may have done wrong and it's giving them a chance to erase their aveiros and turn them into mitzvos by using their painful experiences as a wake up call to change and become better! This is such a chessed from Hashem! Instead of waiting until the person comes in front of Him (after 120 years) to give a din v'cheshbon - an accounting - for each thing they did wrong in their life, Hashem gives them a chance to correct their misdeeds and change - all while they are still alive! What a gift this is!!